


all or nothing

by debeklena



Category: Vampire Diaries (TV)
Genre: F/M, I Tried, i mean what, twosomes are for the lonesome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-28
Updated: 2014-04-28
Packaged: 2018-01-21 02:08:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1533713
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/debeklena/pseuds/debeklena
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Damon/Katherine & Damon/Elena. Set somewhere in s5. Damon has always seen them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	all or nothing

Damon has always seen them.

Never has he asked them to stop moving or sit up straight and look pretty for appearances sake. That isn’t who he was. It’s not who he is. When Elena’s eyes drift open he’s not sure how he didn’t tell the difference the second he laid eyes on her; it’s not any one thing, but he’s certain their eyes meet that she is not Katherine (and Katherine isn’t her.) Stefan would say that it’s because Elena’s softer, warmer, innocent—any range of adjectives that have all since lost any meaning for him. The thought never crosses his mind, not in wish fulfillment or explanation. Damon knows better.

Katherine is just as capable of producing warmth, and when their bodies had lain together in the morning, all of the sharp edges and curves that made Katherine Katherine (he is sure that is the definition of love) had faded away. And no matter how much Stefan would love to anchor Elena to Ferris wheels at dawn and the last dance at prom, innocence is something Elena lost a long time ago (she’s killed and seen too much for that now; been driven off one too many bridges and survived one too many fires to go back - she’ll never come ‘home’ again, and he’s not so sure she’d want to, not when she couldn’t even recognize the walls or that damned horse picture above her bed.) 

It makes no difference to him, but those kinds of things mean everything to his brother: Stefan’s all about “should” and love stories with happy endings (it’s why he and Katherine never had a chance; Katherine’s smarter than that.

She never wins. There is no winning. Only survival.)

Elena never replaced Katherine, just as a blind fool (quite the contrary; Katherine sees better than anyone, and she’s anything but a fool) with Elena’s face could never burn him in the way Elena can (destroy, perhaps, but burning has always been Elena’s specialty.) Katherine and Elena are two very different people, and he spends a lot of time thinking about each of them.

Katherine’s selfish, and only wants him to love her like he loves her when they’re fighting or fucking, with a little silence in between.

Elena’s different (she loves the person Katherine made him, against all odds, and also loves the way he loves her; blindly and recklessly, without fear of consumption - Katherine taught him that, too, by refusing to accept or deny it, and Elena helped by being drained on silly little rocks, sacrificing herself on bridges, and somehow managing to still wait for him in their bed at night.)

Both are all or nothing; there is no Katherine without Damon and no Damon without Katherine. Katherine is Katherine and Damon is Damon (and both are infinitely connected, never separate, never faltering. Goodbyes don’t exist.) Elena loves what Katherine’s taught him, and she’s sure she’ll spend her life learning from him, tearing a little deeper and letting him pick up the pieces, if only for the sake of making sure he knows she’s never going to leave him

(It’s only right to return the favor. 

A promise for a promise, a hand for a hand, and a head for a heart.)


End file.
